Los Angeles, Feb 2 (TIWN) Hollywood star Nicole Kidman's career has spanned nearly four decades. Her trophy shelf includes an Oscar, two Emmys, a SAG Award and a BAFTA.

She is a favourite to pick up her fifth Academy Award nomination next week for her work as Lucille Ball in 'Being the Ricardos', reports variety.com.  Even so, Kidman acknowledges the road to today has also included some bumps.

"I had that sort of in my early thirties where I was like, 'Right, I think this is kind of going to be it'," the Aussie actor tells me on today's episode of the "Just for Variety" podcast.  "And then I had it again at 40. And so I've run that gamut where you just go, 'Now's the time that I'm going to be put out to pasture'."  It wasn't the fear of losing fame that scared Kidman during the down times, but the thought of not being able to pursue her art. "That feels at times like a gut wrenching," says Kidman.  "And then going, 'Okay, well I got to find other things that interest me that I love'. That's the journey of life, isn't it? And then suddenly going, 'This has blossomed ... or this has opened up, and now I have this chance to do something'." 

"So it's always been like this, and I know it will always be like that. I'm on the ride."  In the Aaron Sorkin-written and directed 'Being the Ricardos', she plays Lucille Ball during a week-long production of one episode of "I Love Lucy" Javier Bardem plays Desi Arnaz.  In one flashback scene, Ball is shown losing her contract at RKO Pictures. She was 39 at the time, but she gets her career back after doing a hit radio show. At the time, radio felt like a step down.